Thoughts of a 9 Month Pregnant lady

Almost 9 months. Photo by Justin Hackworth

When I found out I was expecting a baby early last December, I knew immediately that this would be my best pregnancy and birthing experience yet. I knew this, simply because I decided it would be so. I have constantly affirmed to myself and to others that I feel fantastic. And folks, I've made it through 9 months under the best circumstances possible. Not to say I haven't had my moments. My hormones have definitely made several guest appearances in the form of inexplicable crying, acne, and fatigue. But hey, I'm growing a human here, so hormones are part of the deal. I don't share this with you to boast that "my pregnancy is better than yours." I share this with you because I've developed a theory that I think might interest a few of you (and might upset others of you).

Often, as women, we are unknowingly conditioned for pregnancy and delivery by the stories we hear from our moms, sisters, friends and good, old Hollywood. Wouldn't you agree that the larger part of these stories involve sickness, dyer complications and horrific, painful labors? Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that these things are bogus, or that women create these situations. But, I do think that when we are influenced by the experiences of others, our brains want to create a similar experience. I look back to my last two pregnancies and deliveries. They were not good experiences for me. But I think they could have been had I been consciously filling my mind with positive pregnancy and birth stories. Yet, I had none in my brain to draw upon.

When I delivered my boys, I didn't know I had options. I simply showed up at the hospital and let everyone tell me what to do. Honestly, most of the time, no one even asked me. They just delivered my boys the way that was convenient for them. Did I really want Pitocin? No one asked. They just told me that I would be given Pitocin. Did anyone make sure I was cool with an episiotomy? I didn't even know I'd had one until it was all over. Did anyone ask me if I wanted to hold my babies right away? Never. They were both just whisked away, bathed and given shots and tests I had no knowledge of. At the time, I just accepted this as protocol. I didn't know any other way. Had I known, I think I would have had a much more desirable experience. So, if you get anything out of this post, it's this: Your pregnancy and delivery experience don't have to be dramatically terrible. You may have special circumstances, and bless you if you do. But then again, you may have a fabulous experience. You have a lot more control over the experience than you may realize. You have empowering choices and you can make this experience your own.

So, now, the true test of my theory will come into play very soon. I'm due in 3 weeks. I am doing an all-natural birth using HypnoBirthing (a method using deep relaxation exercises to minimize pain during labor). I'll let you know how it goes.